Video: The Four Conversational Strategies

Video Transcript

Ally relationships are made one conversation at a time. And in Cultivate. The Power of Winning Relationships, I talk about four conversational strategies, that if you apply them, will ensure that you are cultivating and building Ally relationships.

(0:28) Ally relationships are made one conversation at a time. And in Cultivate. The Power of Winning Relationships, I talk about four conversational strategies that help ensure that you are building and cultivating Ally relationships.

(0:45) Those strategies are: Align, Adjust, Applaud and Baggage. Let me talk to you about what I mean.

(0:53) The Align conversation is the most critical one. I talked in the earlier video where I talked about the business I was in, Corporate Finance, where it was all about numbers. We didn’t talk about how we were going to work together to deliver that business strategy.

So “Align” is about sitting down and understanding how we’re going to communicate, when to escalate. If I have a problem or a question, how do I raise that in a way that drives candor and debate? It is setting the ground rules for everything that follows.

(1:28) And there’s one thing that I’ve learnt: the more senior you are, the more experienced you are in your industry, the less likely that that conversation happens. There is an implicit assumption that you know how to do it and you’ll work it out. And I’m sure you will. Because there’s a reason you got to where you are today in your career. But at what cost? And so by being deliberate, you can accelerate your success, by ensuring that you and those that work with you are aligned in expectations.

(2:00) Which brings us to number two: Adjust. Because even when we’ve had the conversation about how we’re going to work together, occasionally we forget. We slip back into old habits. And so having had the Align conversation, it makes it much easier to have the Adjust conversations. One where we get back on track and we solve any misunderstandings.

(2:20) Do those first two well and that leads to number three and Applaud, celebrating success. Whether it’s our own, whether it’s yours, whether it’s our success. Giving recognition where needed, regularly.

(2:35) So the final element is Baggage conversation. And a Baggage conversation is about clearing the air. It’s about maybe apologizing for what has gone before. But it allows you to let go of any bad feeling and move into the Align conversation that sets the way forward for how you’re going to work together in the future.

(3:00) So as I mentioned at the start: Relationships are made or broken one conversation at a time. But you’re not stuck. And if you read Cultivate. The Power of Winning Relationships, if you look at the conversational tactics that go with each of these four strategies, I guarantee that you will see a change in the quality and the health of your professional relationships.

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